4th day in a row at the lake. After dodging strong storms all day that kept the temperature just perfect, there was an evening break and the lake was surreal, quiet, smooth.
Did a set of water running but no significant swimming, as the thunder was rumbling in the distance. I really needed to burn some calories. My diet has been bad. Yesterday, just wasa crackers, fig jam, a banana sandwich and tea. Today only slightly better, sardines, spring mix lettuce, wasa crackers, Royo bagel w/ almond butter and honey.
Water running
6 x 60 strides with 1 min rest
Max HR 143
Spent 80 min at the cathedral practicing after midnight. It was actually pretty taxing. Got home, fell asleep in a chair and slept straight until 8 am. Got up, did my usual bedtime regime and went back to bed for 90 min.
I love the sound and the feel of playing music but, to pull off a concert of virtuoso repertoire, it takes an enormous amount of time and commitment, and even then, rarely is a performance perfect. Not to mention the stress involved. At this stage of my career, there actually seems to be more to lose than gain in some ways. The stress involved, the risk of a substandard performance. I never perform 'badly' but sometimes have had mistakes, memory slips, etc... and like a car wreck in an auto race, that's what people remember the most. That's why I wonder sometimes if I should even do it. Some of my colleagues have stopped or scaled back performing. Years past there were rewards involving academic standing, tenure, money, career, etc... but now none of those things are at stake or an issue. It's all personal. Making video recordings for Youtube is actually a better way to reach the public instead of giving a guitar recital. Rarely have I played a guitar recital for more than 80 people or so, typically it's like 40-50. Social media reaches so many more. But, to be a teacher and proponent of the rare art of solo classical guitar performance, since I can do it, I should do it. I need to set an example and attempt to inspire students. 20+ yrs ago, I inspired a bright kid from East TN who was a heavy metal shredder. Years later he was performing in Carnegie Hall and playing for ambassadors, now recognized as one of the best guitarists in the world.
Been working on the Rameau variations again. No one in the world played this piece but me until just the last few yrs, now a few have. Probably the single most important and unique piece I've ever played, but I stopped playing it in concerts about 15 yrs ago because of the difficulty. I'm fairly sure I will perform it this fall. Taking a fresh look at it. Fingers are still working.
Like racing a 400m... we do these things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard. Beautiful and expressive as well.
Back to the cathedral tonight.